We all have insecurities – those little nagging self-deprecating thoughts that just don’t seem to go away. Sometimes these thoughts become so overwhelming that they start to affect our daily lives. When that happens, people usually tend to find someone or something that tells them that it’s not so bad. When someone opens up to you about their insecurities or unfavourable circumstances, take it upon yourself to build them up. Do your best to make them feel loved and worthy because sometimes we all need a little reassurance to get back on our feet.
Why should you invest in building someone else up? Well for starters, good karma. Secondly, the time and energy that you spend on making others feel good about themselves also help you. So if not for someone else, do it for you.
Here’s how helping someone get a little positive perspective can be such a rewarding experience.
Gives purpose to your pain
More often than not when we’re going through tough times we can’t help but think why is this happening to me? Sometimes it is hard to come to terms with your hardships and accept them as a part of your life. The thing is that just like evolution the more you endure the stronger and wiser you become.
It equips you to put things in perspective for other people who are in similar situations. Helping someone by giving them insider’s view makes you feel like all that unnecessary pain and suffering finally has a purpose – to help a particular person in need.
Helps you become more grateful
When someone opens up to you about their insecurities and personal struggles it helps you realize that you’re not the only one who’s struggling – a fact that we tend to forget very often. At some level, we are all going through the same stuff in one form or the other. You may even realize that some people have it way worse than you do. This is of course not to undermine your own issues but it certainly helps you become more grateful. It opens your mind up to your blessings and ultimately helps you become more appreciative of what you have.
Makes you more empathetic
Empathy is one of the beautiful parts of being human. People who are empathetic have richer experiences in life as they feel more and understand more about the people around them. When you lend an ear to someone who needs to vent, appreciate them for who they are, and try to direct their attention towards their good qualities you have to put yourself in their shoes first. It allows you to see life from another perspective and broadens your worldview.
Recipe for stronger relationships
Helping someone develop a positive sense of self unravels both of your strengths and weaknesses. Sometimes to help someone gain a little perspective you have to expose your own vulnerabilities. It helps them accept their own shortcomings by making them realize that none of us are perfect and that we are all human.
According to the “onion model” of social penetration theory, self-disclosure leads to the formation of stronger relationships. If personality is an onion then fears and insecurities are the second last layer of the onion. When you delve into deeper conversations peeling of the superficial layers you create a recipe for the most substantial and long-lasting relationships.
Calls for introspection
When you hear someone talk about their insecurities it automatically makes you think about your strengths, weaknesses, and vulnerabilities. It makes you probe into your life’s journey and how you cope with your problems.
While you’re the one trying to build the other person up you may learn a lot about yourself. While you’re helping them cope with their unfavorable circumstances they might teach you a thing or two about life as well. It’s a learning process.
Do good, feel good
When all is said and done and you have invested some time and energy to make someone feel worthy, you’re taken over with this amazing sense of satisfaction. The feeling of doing good inevitably makes you feel good about yourself, you exude positive vibes and go to bed a happier and richer person.
When was the last time you built someone up? How does it help you? Share in the comments below.